Hormones, Estrogen, and the Conversations
I found myself asking questions I never thought I’d be asking while I was still going through treatment. Not about chemo. Not about scans. About hormones. Hot flashes. Estrogen.
And what I was supposed to do now. Life after breast cancer is challenging, but you can do it!
When Treatment Pushes You Into Menopause
At some point during treatment, my body just shifted. For me, it felt like I was pushed straight into menopause.
Not slowly. Not something that eased in. Just there. I didn’t really understand what that would mean until I was in it.
What Hot Flashes Actually Feel Like
They come out of nowhere. One minute you’re fine. The next you’re flushed, uncomfortable, and trying to hold it together like nothing’s happening.
It’s not just “feeling warm.” It’s your body doing something you can’t control.
So I started asking questions. What can I take? What actually helps? What’s safe after breast cancer?
Trying to Get Answers About Hormones
After asking a few times, I was told to take B6 and B12. That was the answer. Vitamins.
And hormones were completely OFF the table. I asked my doctor what I could take instead of estrogen to help keep things normal. Healthy. Because I’m going through cancer, I’m not disappearing.
I still care about my body. I still care about that part of my life.
His response was immediate.
“Whatever you do, DO NOT take estrogen.”
I asked why.
And what he said was that even though I’m triple negative, it could be where one tiny cell has it.
I’ll be honest, that still doesn’t fully make sense to me. Maybe medically it does. But sitting there, trying to understand what I’m supposed to do next, it just felt confusing.
And then he said something that honestly caught me completely off guard.
“I can give you a meat tenderizer.”
What?! That was my exact reaction.
It was one of those moments where you don’t know whether to laugh or just sit there thinking, did that really just happen?
And maybe I can laugh about it a little now. But at the time, it didn’t feel small. Because the question I was asking wasn’t small.
When One Answer Isn’t Enough
So I kept asking.
I went to a gynecologic oncologist, because at some point you realize you need more than one opinion when it comes to hormones after cancer.
That conversation felt different. He told me I could use Revaree by Bonafide, which is hormone-free.
Is it the same as estrogen? NO. But it was at least an option. Something that made more sense than what I had heard before.
And this is where it gets complicated. Because oncology puts a lot of weight on staying away from hormones after breast cancer. You hear it over and over:
Don’t take estrogen. Don’t risk it. There are so many medical suggestions on this very topic. I have been extremely cautious of what I hear, and what I read. Here is a medical resource that offers more on this topic. I would encourage you to ask questions with your medical team OR teams.
And after everything you’re going through, of course you listen. But this is also where things started to feel more real for me. Because this isn’t just about hot flashes. It’s about your body as a whole.
Your female health. How things feel. What’s changing. I’m 50. I’ve been in a relationship for five years.
I’m going through cancer, I’m not dead.
And yes, taking care of that part of my body still matters to me. No one really talks about this in a real way.
What happens. What changes. What’s safe. What isn’t.
You’re told what not to take. Don’t take estrogen. Don’t take hormones.
But there’s not always a clear conversation about what you can do instead.
And that’s where it gets frustrating. Because this isn’t just about getting through treatment.
It’s about how you live in your body while you’re going through it, and that part matters too.
The gynecologic oncologist also sent me an article after my visit. He told me that even women who’ve had a partial hysterectomy may need to consider having their ovaries removed because survival rates are higher.
That’s not a small conversation. That’s your life, and these are the kinds of decisions you’re suddenly trying to process while you’re still in treatment.
Figuring It Out As You Go
The menopause side of this has been its own challenge.
Hot flashes. Sleep interruptions. Just feeling OFF in your own body. It’s not something I was prepared for.
And it’s not something that gets talked about enough in a real way.
So you end up figuring a lot of it out as you go. Asking questions Looking for better answers. Trying to understand what your body is doing now.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned in this part of it, it’s this, you have to advocate for yourself.
Get another opinion. Don’t settle for an answer that doesn’t feel right.
Because these conversations matter. Even the uncomfortable ones. Even the ones that come with answers you didn’t expect.
If you’re walking through treatment or trying to make sense of what your body is doing right now, I put together something from my own experience.
Just what helped me think through this part a little more clearly.
